Val was caught off-guard. Everything since last night was a blur: Normal life, interrupted by a fall, excruciating pain, a trip to the Emergency Room, paperwork, wheelchairs, x-rays, pain meds, and finally, a cast.
In all of that action she’d forgotten that the cast and crutches were rather conspicuous. She’d forgotten that she’d have to explain the “What happened?” to people, especially work people.
And she hadn’t thought of a good cover story. And she wasn’t good at thinking on her feet (or foot, as it were).
Which explains the verbal train wreck that proceeded to spill out of Val’s mouth:
“Oh, this? I was…uh, getting uhh-up out of uh, fff-I was ff-playing football and there, and I, uh…the ball, no, was-uhh there was there…I slipped on some slip on some slippery the fffloor surface was slip-was slippery and I lost my balance because and slipped and my leg was slip-I twist I got twisted around, sort of, you know, and it was the craziest thing because I…was throwing or just kind of actually it wasn’t football but it was sports it, uh, was like…exercise and I just…um, kind of you know sweatin’ it out like Sweatin’ To The Oldies but without the Oldies but it was slip-it may have been slip, I stepped…I may have stepped and slipped in sweat. Honestly it just happened SO FAST.”
“Oh. OK.” Shelly smiled politely and walked away thoroughly confused.
Nailed it, Val thought to herself (self-awareness was also not one of her strong suits).
She eased herself into her chair and smiled, proud of herself for thinking on her feet and not blurting out the truth: That she was at her sister’s place for dinner last night, that the conversation had inexplicably turned to a discussion of Michael Jackson, that Val decided she needed to demonstrate the moonwalk for her niece who’d never seen it before, and that she’d slipped on the kitchen tile and popped her knee cap right out of place.
Yeah, “I slipped in sweat not Sweatin’ To The Oldies but sweat exercise just getting up throwing a football but actually not football just slippery stepped and slipped in some sweat” was a GREAT cover, she thought. Score one for ME!
And she pumped her fist and totally strained her obliques while doing it.