His New Phone, About Thirty Seconds Earlier
The guy bundled up in his sleeping bag on the sidewalk turned to the guy next to him sitting on a lawn chair.
He glanced at his watch. “So…in about two hours we’ll both have ourselves new iPhones, huh?”
Lawn Chair Guy turned and looked at Sleeping Bag Guy. “Huh? Were you talking to me?”
“Yeah. I was just saying we’ll both have new phones soon.”
“What are you talking about?”
Sleeping Bag Guy held up his current phone (which he now found impossible not to view with utter contempt seeing as how it was going to be replaced shortly, officially rendering it a worthless piece of garbage). “New phones? We’ll have ’em soon.” He motioned towards the store.
Lawn Chair Guy craned his neck and looked at the glowing apple, then turned towards Sleeping Bag Guy, eyes wide, breathing heavily.
“Wait–you mean to tell me this” (he motioned to the crowd lined up down the block and around the corner) “ISN’T the line for Huey Lewis and the News tickets?”
Lawn Chair Guy stood up. “SON of a–” He picked up his chair and hurled it into the street. “GOD!”
He stormed off, leaving a trail of mumbled profanity in his wake.
Sleeping Bag Guy watched him go, then snapped out of it and quickly slid up one place in line, occupying Lawn Chair Guy’s former spot.
He’d never been a big Huey Lewis and the News fan, but kind of thanks to them, he’d now be getting his new phone about thirty seconds earlier. He started humming “The Heart of Rock & Roll” to himself and smiled.