Three Hundred (Dollars)
“OK, three hundred, I got three hundred, can I get three hundred, three hundred?”
(It was an auctioneer saying this, so it was being said super fast, auctioneer-style).
Kyle stood there watching. He was probably going to let this one go.
“Psst! Dude–would you pay three hundred bucks for that?” came a voice behind him.
Without turning around, Kyle whispered back “Yeah, I would–under different circumstances, if I had someone in mind I could resell it t–”
The man grabbed Kyle’s arm, raised it, and started shouting.
“Here, right here! Three hundred dollars!”
And right as he managed to yank his arm away, Kyle saw the auctioneer point in his direction.
“SOLD to the gentleman to my right–three hundred dollars!” He pounded his gavel.
“What? No, I–” Kyle turned to point out the man who had raised his arm against his will, but the guy had vanished.
After the auction ended, he tried to explain to the cashier how he hadn’t actually wanted to bid on the lot he’d won, how he was talking to some other guy and explaining to him how, on another day under different circumstances he might have placed a bid on that lot but not today, and then the next thing he knew the guy grabbed his arm and forced him to bid.
And then Kyle heard a familiar voice coming from the other side of the cashier’s window.
“That guy–he’s in there! I recognize his voice, I–wait. He works for you…doesn’t he?”
He heard giggles from the other side of the window.
“That’s illegal! I–”
Kyle was cut off by the cashier, who curtly informed him that he was mistaken about this alleged man who had bid for him, and that speaking of legal and not legal, he would be the one facing legal action if he didn’t pay for the lot he had won.
So Kyle paid the three hundred dollars–wondering how he was going to turn a profit after paying that much for a lot of miscellaneous Steve Urkel memorabilia without even having any interested parties lined up to whom he could re-sell the stuff–and silently vowed he’d never do business with Asse & Sons Auctions ever again.
You have just finished reading story number 300 on this here blog o’ mine, so this seems like a good time to say, once again: THANK YOU. Thank you for reading, commenting, liking, sharing…it means more than you know. Thank you.